Why We Let Our Daughter Color Her Hair


hair colorMy daughter who just started 6th grade is kind, generous, really, really good at math, a Girl Scout who just got her Bronze Award. She also happens to have turquoise blue hair. 

It may surprise some when they realize my husband (who is in the insurance industry) and I (a school administrator) have allowed her to have colored hair for the last three years.  We both feel strongly about letting our daughter express herself in ways she feels is right for her when it comes to her appearance, within reason for her age of course. For us, hair color and style is something we give her autonomy around and have for many years. 

I grew up with a cosmetologist as a mother whose philosophy around hair was “It is only hair; you can cut it or color it tomorrow if you don’t like it.” I have that same stance with my daughter. When she first asked to color her hair we started with just the tips for that very reason; it was easy to just cut if she didn’t like it or when it faded. She rocked her red tips to start the 4th grade and for the first half of the school year. And again in 5th grade. 

Kids and Colored Hair

I have friends who allow their kids to dye their hair and friends who don’t. I think both sets of parents are doing what is right and best for their families. My hope is we don’t judge others based on the decision we make for our families around any choice.

However, I must admit I have seen people do double-takes of kids with colored hair with curious expressions that range from “Wow, that’s cool” to “Who would let their kid do that?” 

It makes me sad when I see and feel that judgment because I think of my daughter. I would hate for someone to judge her based on the way she chooses to wear her hair.

Our kids are all so much more than what they look like, what they choose to wear, or how they like their hair. Let’s strive to treat them like the individuals they are and respect the choices they made.

When my daughter decided she wanted to dye the bottom layer of her hair blue my first call was to my stylist. At home hair bleaching can be tricky to get right and result in patchy color, yellow hair, or badly damaged hair. Luckily for us, my stylist was able to bleach the bottom layer of her hair but had just run out of blue dye so I was on my own.

Tips for Dyeing Hair

I really recommend leaving bleaching hair to an expert especially if you or your child have naturally dark hair because there is a lot of science involved to get it just right. It was worth the time and money for us for sure! 

After we returned home from the salon with freshly bleached hair and a newly purchased bottle of blue dye, we lined the kitchen floor with newspaper, put on old clothes, and got to work. If you have ever tried coloring your hair yourself you know how challenging it is. I will admit adding bright blue dye into the mix made it more stressful for me. It was so messy! About an hour later my daughter’s clothes, most of her skin, and my entire bathtub were a lovely shade of blue from washing her hair until the water ran clear, approximately 1 million times for us. 

As I lamented about the kitchen rug that will never look the same while I scrubbed the bathtub, my daughter was drying and styling her new hair. I could hear her saying things like, “It is perfect! and I love it more than I thought I would,” and I knew it was all worth it. 

There are lots of great things about being a mom; one of my current favorites is watching my child become who she wants to be. It just so happens my daughter is meant to have a beautiful layer of turquoise blue hair.

Do you let your kid have colored hair?

colored hair


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