We don’t talk about periods enough. Or menopause. Or what happens in between.
But it’s time we start.
Because right now, under one roof, my daughter and I are both standing on the edge of big change. Hers on the beginning side, and mine somewhere in the unknown middle.
A House Full of Hormones
I see my daughter growing into herself, becoming more curious about the changes ahead. I’m in perimenopause and watching myself change in ways I wasn’t prepared for. My hair is thinning, my eyesight seems to be changing and some days my brain fog makes me… wait, what was I saying?
It’s wild to watch her body ramp up while mine starts to wind down. But, it also feels like we’re walking through it together.
Resetting the Narrative
I’m taking this time to reset the narrative around women’s health for both of us. I want my daughter to know that her body is not something to be ashamed of or embarrassed by. It’s something to be curious about, to care for, and to listen to. Knowledge is power.
That’s why I’ve been reading and talking about what’s happening to me. I started by reading the book Hot and Bothered by Jancee Dunn. It’s a candid look at menopause filled with personal stories from women who had a variety of experiences. I am currently reading How to Menopause by Tamsen Fadal for a great overview to get you started, and a guide to refer back to when you’re up at night and need tips on how to get back to sleep.
I’ve also been exploring how to help my daughter see strength in all its forms — physical, emotional, and mental. I am reading Strong As a Girl by Kate Rope, which has helpful reminders that confidence grows from knowledge and openness.
I haven’t found the perfect puberty book, mainly because I want my daughter to find that for herself. She has found knowledge in connecting with her friends and hearing their stories, while I have prepped her on our family history.
The Science of Change
Another book that has completely reframed how I think about this stage of life is The Menopause Brain by Lisa Mosconi. It explains how a woman’s brain actually rewires itself during three key milestones: puberty, pregnancy, and menopause.
I love the analogy of it being like moving a couch in your home. You are still in the same house, the couch is still there, but now you have to learn to navigate around it differently. You’re still you, but your brain is adjusting, reorienting, learning new pathways.
That image feels spot on for me right now, and the easiest way to explain to myself and my daughter what is going on and why I can’t remember where my phone went when it’s right in my hand.
Strength from the Inside Out
Part of this season is learning to strengthen what I can, like my pelvic floor (jumping jacks aren’t what they used to be). But it’s also about strengthening my voice.
I’m choosing to talk openly about perimenopause including the mood swings, the fog, the frustration, the beauty of it all. Because silence doesn’t serve anyone. Knowledge is power and I’ve found myself starting so many conversations with friends and family with, “Have I talked to you about menopause yet?”
If my daughter sees me navigate these changes with honesty and humor, maybe she’ll grow up knowing it’s OK to talk openly about her body, and to advocate for herself and others with confidence.
Let’s Keep Talking
Whether it’s puberty or perimenopause, periods or hot flashes, our bodies are constantly evolving and that’s something worth discussing, not hiding.
Whether you are pregnant, in puberty, or a parent of a grown child, there is always something to explore with women’s health. I challenge you this month to take time to do one or all of these things for yourself and for the women around you:
- Read up on the next “phase” in your health journey. Whether you’re approaching puberty, pregnancy, perimenopause, or post-menopause, take time to learn what’s ahead. Understanding how your body works and how it changes helps you make informed choices, ask better questions, and embrace each stage with confidence instead of uncertainty.
- Talk about it. Share your experiences with other women in your circle, from friends to coworkers to family. And not just women! Men need to be part of this conversation, too. The more openly we talk about things like perimenopause, periods, and hormones, the more we normalize them. The more we normalize, the more we learn and grow together.
- Ask questions without shame. If something feels off, bring it up with your doctor or a trusted professional. Silence helps no one. You know your body better than anyone, so if something doesn’t feel right, keep asking until you get answers that make sense.
- Schedule your screenings. Annual checkups, mammograms, Pap smears, and bone density tests are acts of self-respect, not chores. Prioritize them as you would any other important appointment because prevention and awareness are powerful forms of self-care.
- Learn from women older than you. Their insights can help you navigate what’s next with less fear and more understanding. Ask about their experiences, the good, the challenging, and everything in between. Their stories can prepare and empower you for your own next chapter.
