I have been alive for 43 years. For the better part of 16 of those years, I have been diapering one or more of my children.
My youngest will be four soon and while he definitely took his sweet time potty training, he has now fully transitioned out of diapers. Most importantly, my husband and I are done having babies.
I recently donated our leftover diapers to a friend. As soon as I walked away from that exchange I thought aloud, “now what?”
What am I going to do with all my excess time, extra money, and better-smelling trash bins?
Whatever I want!
I’m free! Free to walk by the diaper aisle at Target and not stop to check for the best diaper deal.
Free to never again have to pack out a stinky diaper from the doctor’s office or the hiking trail.
Free to use the $20 to $40 dollars (I once budgeted monthly for diapers) doing all sorts of crazy things – like buying the name brand sour cream and splurging on overpriced leggings.
Free to add another set of character-themed underwear to my weekly laundry pile.
I should be elated with this freedom, and mostly I am.
So why am I also a little bit sad?
I’m not sad to be done with babies. It’s time. I know it in my heart, in my head, and in my varicose veins.
Caring for babies is hard, but watching your kids grow up is hard too. It all happens so fast and so slow, simultaneously.
So I think that’s why I’m feeling a little sad.
But mostly it’s awesome!
Moving forward our family will be moving forward. We’ll be fully out of the baby years and fully into the big kid years.
Diaper runs will be replaced with visits to the orthodontist, and I’ll teach my kids to clean the bathroom all by themselves rather than teaching them to potty train.
It’s a step in the right direction, a stage that I’m excited to embrace.